Folding Paper

YEAR ONE DAY ONE

Over the summer, there was an exercise.  Pick a verb from a list composed by Richard Serra, and manipulate some sheets of A4 printer paper in the manner of that verb.

So today, for the beginning of my second adventure in University, we do so again, only with a tad more guiding. To whit: Pick a new word from the verb list, find new ways of manipulating.  No outside materials, just folding, tearing, curving and so on.  I think 2D, painter and all that, so I'm trying, as I did over the summer, to not make flat pieces.  Shame the most effective one was 2D. 

My 3D work lack structural integrity, I'm not so good at making things stay upright.  There must be a way of mixing 2 and 3D. 

I don't think I'm overthinking too much yet, more getting carried away with just making.  I found myself just manipulating the paper, making what looked and felt good to make, without any thought to how it related to the base verb. 

The problem there, of course, is that in pulling back and reconsidering the verb, you do start thinking maybe a tad too much.  In my case, pulled out of the moment and then staring at the construction and wondering what the hell I'm doing.

Not helped of course by having to drop out for an hour or so in the middle of everything.  I feel I was very much distracted by my counselling.  I couldn't really shake the negativity for the rest of the afternoon.  I'm still feeling somewhat of an 'otherness', like I don't fit in.  We shall see how it goes.

Fast update

Okay, been a while.  Thinking about art and challenging myself again. So, on the iPad (seriously, this thing has given me a new lease on artistic life, even if I can't seem to escape the artificiality of it) I've try to work on something a little smaller scale with a more restricted almost pastel palette.

I'm actually quite happy with how it turned out.  It's got a kinda isolated landscape quality to it, even though I didn't approach it from that direction.

So where do we go from here with it?  I also worked on a mood painting while watching the film Rush, and that seemed to go okay, even if it's even more artificial.  I might have overused the filters but the speed that they give you is a tremendous time saver.

Not sure where I'm going with this. 

TFNation 2019

What a ride.

A long weekend, from Thursday to Tuesday full of…well, a lot of things.  One of the best things about TFN is reconnecting with people.  I’m pretty bad at talking to folk online.  I was diagnosed as autistic a year or so back, so that makes sense now.  In a purely text based form of communication, I miss out on what the meaning behind the written words actually is,  I’m better face to face because then I can read body language and pick up context.  So online, I’m… a little quieter.  I watch what everyone is saying, but don’t get involved.  So TFN is my one chance to see and interact with all the cool people like how I want to all year, but can’t.  It is so good to finally hear voices and see smiles and indulge in hugs and jokes and hashtag bantz.

And then the social anxiety kicks in, and I retreat into a lot of what I do online.  Sitting on the outside, not sure of how to react.  Do these people really like me?  Really? It’s hard to overcome, but I try.  I don’t think I let it beat me too much this year but the panic was there.

Also something that was giving me anxiety was the Forge.  I’ve done a lot of prep and work for this year and I’ll be honest…it was preying on my mind.  I just wanted to go in and get set up, so being able to do that on the Friday was a huge relief.  It meant I could relax in the evening, and enjoy the company I found myself in.  Kris and Jim…  I thought I was going to die with all the Robocop variants we came up with, but if there isn’t a RoboLollipop Person (“Dead or alive, you’re crossing with me”) in the works by next years TFN, I will have words!  We spent some time mesmerised by dancers in the corridor and just having a good time.

Did I do panels on Friday?  I know I took part in the quiz.  Nailed a couple of pretty tough questions (‘What colour was the Powerlinx symbol on the leader class toys in Energon’ and ‘Which city did Rung hail from’ being the standouts) but ultimately our team just couldn’t pass the bar.  It was a bloody fun time though.  

Saturday was a blast.  The opening ceremony was cool, and the opening videos just get better and better.  I was actually getting emotional from it.  The double teaming from Stan Bush and Kris Carter was just too much! Then a sprint back to the main hall to try and look around before the doors opened, but I was stopped in my tracks by VA and guest, Brian Drummond, who wanted to buy all my Jetstorm prints for his table.  I gave him a healthy discount, (how could I not?) and when he asked if I could get more printed I think I just about professionally exploded.  I hope I kept it together in front of him, and I hope he managed to shift them all.  He’s a dude, is that one.  That was the first highlight of the weekend, speaking as an artist, but not the last.  

I was pretty worried about the Forge most of the weekend.  We didn’t seem to be selling much.  A few folk came by and nodded or pointed at things but moved on.  Yet somehow at the end of the days, we’d made a fair profit.  Most odd.  Just as an FYI people, I want to do more commissions next year!  Hit me up!  I really enjoy being busy behind the table like that, and it keeps me from feeling like I don’t belong.  I wish I could do it more often.  The company was grand, too, and it would not be as special without Lindsey and Gav, who are great company and adopted the Ziltoid puppet I took as a mascot and because my Twitter avatar is Ziltoid, maybe folks would recognise me from it? 

I think our position in the Forge wasn’t the best.  Opposite the entrance doors people ignored us as they rushed in for toys, and didn’t look back on the way out.  Maybe that’s something to look at next year.  Regardless, the Toy-fu section of the stall fared amazingly well and made, if you’ll excuse the language, a shitton of money for charity, and that’s the main thing.  

Second professional highlight was Marian’s reaction to the t-shirt I’d made, based on the design of one of my prints.  I’ve never had someone have such a visceral reaction to something I’d made before and it was humbling and very, very awesome. And skipping ahead a moment, on the Sunday towards the end of the con, I took some of the unsold sketchbooks and gave them to the guest artists.  All of them asked me to sign the books, and seemed genuinely pleased about receiving them, and EJ gave me a small lesson at his table on how to improve my work.  And if that didn’t blow me away, nothing will.  EJ Su has been one of my inspirations for years, and is the reason I got back into Transformers and drawing them in the first place.  So to have that experience…  yeah… wow.  It also gave me the chance to chat with Nick Roche for the first time in a few years, and to chat with Jack Lawrence for the first time ever, I think.  Andrew Griffith is someone I always enjoy having time with and watching him work, and Kei Zama was amazingly cool to hang (and drink!) with all weekend.  

What else stands out?  The Transformers Animated event, which reunited most of the cast of the show to give us a glimpse into what could have been. Chewing the fat in a TGIFriday with Tony, Andy and Aimee.  Standing with Lisa during the cosplay as she explained things. Toy-Fu breaking all the records. The little smile on Turnbulls face as he read the dedication in his copy of the sketchbook. 

Special shoutout to Thunderclash, who stole the show on Saturday night, not only from the Cosplay competition, but the stiff competition of the TFA event. What a guy, indeed.

Oh, yeah.  I bought some toys too.

Oof, this is getting on a bit.  So much gushing.  But that’s what TFN does to you.   Maybe I’ll just close out by saying thanks to all the people who made this such a fun and amazing experience.  My brother Ed, Temple, Kris, Jim, Gav, Lindsey, Lisa, Aimee, Andy T, Andy K, Billy, Dave, Nick, Ralph, Karl, Matt M, Llama, Jo, Kei, Claude, Becka, Jon, Thew, Chris, Geoff, Petrina, Isa, Gareth, Andy S, Zero, James, Mark, Matt D, Colin and all those whose names I was either too drunk or too autistic to remember.  Thank you for an amazing time. You’re all amazing, and you’d better believe it.

And yeah, Sprite.  You were missed.

An Introduction, Of Sorts

Apparently, It's the start of the academic year. At least that's what the diary I bought told me.  So, lets start this off.

Hi, I'm Ben and I'm a mature fine art student.

Or at least I will be, once September rolls around and I'm enrolled and all that good stuff.  So, I'm starting a blog, using a name I've had kicking around forever.

Before September, however, there is the small matter of TFNation to attend, a convention in Birmingham that I'll be tabling at.  Third year this time.  Odd to think that.  If I'd started a degree then, I'd be done now...

But anyway. Some background.  I've been drawing Transformers for a while now.  It's the only real geeky/nerdy thing I'm into.  But I've been painting for most of my life.  Stopped for a while, after Real Life got in the way.  But now I'm back and ready to try again.  My second attempt at getting the BA Hons Fine Art.  It should be interesting to see how much better I cope this time around, if at all.  I already have worries and fears, as an older person than most of my soon-to-be-peers, and the fact I've been out of academia so long.  We shall see, I guess.  But like I said, in the meantime I have a Transforming Robot Convention to deal with.  So today, and most of the rest of this week, I'll be working on my last print.  No idea if I'm going to do a run on these, or just keep it for myself, but that's a bridge to be crossed at the printers.

Sneaky peak: here's the pencils:

So, If I come back here to blog before the convention, expect it to be mostly robots, and then we'll swing back into the fine art stuff afterwards, and start to ramp up to being an actual student again.  

Til next time.